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DALETOONS ARE HERE AND SO ARE YOU

No matter how you wound up here, I hope you enjoy your stay.
Please click on images to view enlargements –Dale

Thursday, June 19, 2014

Spuds on the Warpath

In recent years, the closest thing the team has had to an offensive line is "Hail to the Redskins." Now the guilt riddled left is hell-bent on taking that away. The least disruptive and most cost effective solution for the Skins, would be to replace the formidable proud American Indian profile with the humble redskin potato. That should shut the libs up until they realize that potatoes are members of the tobacco family. –Dale  

Thursday, May 29, 2014

Department of Snakes

Why the long face America? John Kerry hasn't skipped a beat from Hillary in carrying out President Pandora's foreign policy. Turning the blindest of eyes from the outrageous treatment of Christians in the plethora of newly fundamentalist Islamic controlled countries and pushing hard for Israel to commit national suicide. One wonders how they find the time to wring their hands over Vlad Putin and Chinese rumblings while gutting our military. Funny, the only thing left in Pandora's box was HOPE. –Dale

Thursday, April 24, 2014

For the Love of Jeb

Super Moderate Jeb Bush plays out his compassionate scamnesty logic with the help of Hard Left scambag, Harry Reid. If Jeb had been on the Titanic, I'm sure he would have been eager to work with the iceberg, to get things done. –Dale 

Thursday, April 10, 2014

On Un-American Activities

As the world continues to fade to grainy black and white, Barry and his Democrats are bringing back a blast from the past, Blacklisting. In his zeal to root out communist ideology in America, Joe McCarthy used the force of government to ruin the lives of communist dupes in Hollywood and elsewhere. Finally, cooler heads prevailed and the witch hunts came to an end. Now the jackboot is on the other foot. The difference today is that there don't seem to be any cooler heads to put the brakes on this bunch who want to root out traditional American ideology. –Dale

Thursday, March 27, 2014

Obamek

Shrouded in mystery, the sudden disappearance of the Mayan empire baffles historians and provides fodder for the imaginative. What is known about the Mayan culture suggests that the world is a better place without it, or is it? We can imagine that the leadership of the last surviving remnants of the empire was less than optimal. Suppose the Blame Mesoamerica First crowd has weaseled its way into power concerning itself with looting the treasury and subjugating the people to enrich themselves and their comrades. Flash forward: As Mrs. Obama stands on the Great Wall and tells the Chinese how much America sucks, we hope she gives a thought to the injustice perpetrated on the million or so forced laborers who died building the ultimate public works project. Or for the religious and political prisoners that labor in China today. Yeah, right. To quote an unnamed Chinese hotel worker from Michelle's luxurious hotel, "I can't wait for this to be over". We second the motion. –Dale  

Thursday, March 13, 2014

The IRONic Lady

Hillary has worn many hats. College radical, shady lawyer, cattle futures whiz, long suffering first lady, cookie hating mom, undistinguished Senator, and finally Barry's hapless Secretary of State. Strangely, her many endeavors are best characterized by what she didn't know, when. Only a common house cat is better at covering up its own messes. If America's voting public is not yet ready to abandon novelty elections, they might do better to skip proving they aren't sexist and go directly to proving they aren't specieist and elect the cat. –Dale

Thanks to Fairfield Pinpoint Edwards, Editor at All Right Magazine for suggesting the theme.

Thursday, December 5, 2013

A Clockwork Organizer

It's that time of year again. Like clockwork, Barry the Terrible has once again urged his faithful droogs to use the occasion of family holiday gatherings to aggressively promote his hard left agenda. If we want to hear a reverent holiday proclamation from this White House, we'll have to wait for Ramadan. –Dale 

Wednesday, November 20, 2013

Doomsday Progressives

National Geographic, once a picture rich travel magazine, has evolved into another tentacle of the slime coated beast which should be called the Marxist Media. No longer satisfied with perpetuating pseudo-science hoaxes in its glossy pages, NatGeo has branched out to cable television, where it delights in freak shows on American sub-cultures. Doomsday Preppers is perhaps the pinnacle of the genre, where the wackiest survivalists are mocked for the amusement of the rational viewing audience. VoilĂ , preparedness, once a Boy Scout motto, is suddenly grounds for admission to a mental institution. Would that there were a channel that shined a light on the Progressive Globalists and their wacky antics. You needn't check your local listings, it's on 24-7-365. –Dale       

Thursday, October 31, 2013

Liberty Haze

According to Gallup 58% of us are in favor of the legalization of marijuana. With poll numbers like these, our Washington masters will certainly be moved to grant us bread and circuses. Here's a novel idea, let's legalize liberty, return to a limited Constitutional government and learn what it feels like to really breathe free. Even the huddled mass of pot-heads should be able to get their minds around such a simple concept. –Dale

Thursday, October 10, 2013

Stokey Says

A few questions: Is there any doubt that the Federal Government is way too powerful? Is Jimmy Carter the second worst U.S. President? Is the National Park Service only following orders? Does a bear sit in the woods? –Dale

Wednesday, October 2, 2013

The Great Exchange

As Ol' FoFo opens his Obamacare exchanges and plays the government shutdown like a violin, we the sheeple are all the while being marched into Barry's "socially just" abyss. –Dale  

Wednesday, September 11, 2013

Twist of Caliphate

If we trace backward along the red lines drawn by Dear Leader, a reason for his nonsensical behavior emerges. Has Barry been huffing his red marker? What else could be causing him to facilitate the worldwide ascendancy of fundamentalist Islam? Oh yeah, there is his ideology. –Dale

Thursday, August 22, 2013

Whiteboarding

Professional egghead, Karl Rove, is seen here putting the stink in distinction without a difference. When will the GOP leadership stop trying to impress the left by emulating them? The choice they leave the Conservatarian is a trip to hell on a cruise ship or a Saturn V rocket. They banned waterboarding, when will they ban whiteboarding? Torture is torture. –Dale

Wednesday, July 24, 2013

Headboil

The Chris Matthews mystery has been solved. Researchers have discovered that Matthews suffers from advanced stage Cerebral Thrillosis. CT occurs when the brain reaches its maximum containment level of leftist ideas. Once saturation is complete the abnormality begins to boil over into other parts of the body, most often an extremity. A common initial symptom is described as a thrill up a leg associated with autocracy. In the final throes of this condition, the patient's tongue becomes incapable of forming credible statements. CT is highly contagious as evidenced by the behavior of all the employees of MSNBC.  The old adage is true, "The leftist mind is a terrible thing to express." –Dale

Wednesday, July 3, 2013

In Dependence

When the Trayvon Martin tragedy first occurred, our post-racial president insinuated himself into the action by opining how his imaginary son would look like Trayvon. Barry's "free press" went wild trying to create a story of George Zimmerman as a white racist murderer. The Polarizer-In-Chief never misses an occasion to keep us separated into neat, easily manipulated little groups, dependent on ever expanding government programs. You see, Creepy-ass Socialists thrive on the dependence of their subjects, not their independence. I guess Barry's imaginary son might sound a lot like Trayvon too, since the ember never falls far from the crack pipe. –Dale

Fun Fact: The Declaration Of Independence was written in a strange code called cursive.

Thursday, June 20, 2013

Oinkle Sam

The American Medical Association has officially classified obesity as a disease. With this edict, the Obamacare facilitating AMA opens the door for publicly financed mandatory treatment programs, because prevention initiatives have failed. For the full weight of the U.S. Government to be effective in solving this new health crisis, old Uncle Sam will need to bulk up. So, who's the biggest loser in the administrations War on Liberty? We are. –Dale

Thursday, June 6, 2013

Leave It To Liberals

...and Jerry Mathers as the Beaver. Left to the Left, idyllic Mayfield has become a sink hole of Progressive ideology in the Leave it to Beaver lost episode, Beaver's Fever. Beaver, suffering a high fever, dreams that he has been dressed up as a creepy girl and made to stand in front of his class in a bizarre version of Mayfield Elementary, where every subject is infused with Leftist indoctrination. By the end of the show, his fever breaks and all is back to normal. The episode was shelved, as the shows producers found it unbelievably far-fetched and feared the viewing public might just go ape. –Dale

Thursday, May 16, 2013

The Pride of the Yankers

To paraphrase one of Barry's Marxist mentors, Jeremiah Wright, Obama's chickens are coming home to roooost! Speaker Boehner wants to know who's going to jail over the IRS scandal. We've heard many such opening salvos from the Speaker, then comes a round of golf or a getting to know you dinner, and then nothing happens. Unless Congress moves to abolish the IRS and replace our taxation system with an equitable way of financing legitimate government, nothing will change. These guys have been yanking our chains for way too long. If we weren't wearing chains they'd have to find something else to yank. –Dale

Thursday, May 2, 2013

Il Douchey

Does Barnito still have the juice? A cluster of legislative failures, is making The One look pretty watered down these days. His thwarted attempt to ruin Summer vacation travel for the masses, in order to blame the pain on his enemies, is a biggie. All he seems to have left in his bag of tricks is the fast-tracking of cultural rot and the absolute corruption of every Federal agency. –Dale

Monday, April 15, 2013

Assault Shaker

Here's a little something to keep Michael Bloomberg awake at night. Has no one thought to background check this little girl? Since 1914 she has radically changed her appearance no less than six times (presumably, to elude capture by the authorities). No longer content to merely dump salt wherever she goes, this murderous miss is on the warpath, armed with scary looking technology. As the Democrats and Republicons in the Senate "debate" away our Second Amendment freedoms, let's hope they won't overlook the other menaces that threaten the left. –Dale

Thursday, February 14, 2013

Bill of Goods

After the revolution, Tories, loyal to the British Crown, were treated as enemies of war by the Whigs. Many were tarred and feathered, or worse. What if there had been a strange animal calling itself a Progressive Whig, who claimed allegiance to the revolution while acting at every turn to undermine it? Would the true revolutionaries have tolerated such a fraud? While our country crumbles under the weight of leftist government, it's good to be an Obama, prospering from our pain. In this case, I think I've used one too many N's in annals. –Dale 

Wednesday, January 9, 2013

Soldier of Hope

In the wake of the Sandy Hook atrocity, the collective left is spraying out gun control ideas on full auto. Joe Biden has been put in charge of coming up with "common sense" solutions to gun violence. In 2008 candidate Obama referred to his dream to establish a Civilian National Security Force "that's just as powerful, just as strong, just as well funded (as the U.S. Military)." Of course the Democrat propagandist media had no interest in finding out what their dear leader meant by this statement. In 2012 the passage of the FAA Modernization and Reform Act, which makes domestic drone flyovers a reality, also went unquestioned. I suspect my picture will remain hyperbolic, since the folks who voted for this garbage will be persuaded by monumental thinkers such as, Piers Morgan, Jon Stewart, Tavis Smiley, Lady Gaga, etc., and relinquish their offending weapons. It's true that hard cases make bad law but also true that nut cases in high places make miserable societies. –Dale 

Thursday, December 20, 2012

Santa Closed

Christmas 2012. Clutching his government approved revolver, a despondent Santa pores over his mailbag, resigned to becoming the latest casualty in the war on Christmas. Buck up Santa, the war isn't against you or the consumerist glut you've come to symbolize. The war is against Christ and His influence on our society. The same geniuses who banned "Thou shalt not kill" from the public schools are now having nocturnal emissions over their opportunity to use the Sandy Hook atrocity to disarm the law-abiding. Hope you have the merriest Christmas allowable by law. –Dale  

Thursday, November 29, 2012

Lost Soul Train

There's stupid and then there's CELEBRITY STUPID. At last week's Soul Train Awards show, Jamie Foxx, apparently high on hopium, declared Barack Obama to be Lord and Savior. More disturbingly, the crowd reacted with enthusiastic support for his allegedly jocular blasphemy. When 95% of African-American church members have no problem casting a vote in favor of a president with such screamingly anti-Christian policies, something is way wrong. Even fraudulent elections have consequences. –Dale

Thursday, November 8, 2012

Obamatown

The old divide and conquer strategy worked like a charm. Dupe America has won the day, but her Obama jones will prove to be her undoing. Loosely quoting John MacArthur, "The sins listed in Romans 1 are the heart of the Democratic Party platform." This election was likely America's final break with the God of our fathers. God will not force Himself on anyone or any nation. He will allow us to have our will. This will come as welcome news to many until they realize that the blessings of Liberty will go with Him. –Dale

To all my fantastic friends on this blog: I want to thank you all for the encouragement you have given me over the years. This will be my last toon for a while, as I devote more attention to things that have been on my back burner for the last four years. I still plan to post sporadically, but look forward to a break from the "wonderful" world of politics.

Thursday, November 1, 2012

Shhhh

The "Mainstream Media" continues to ignore the Benghazi Superstory in order to protect Dear Leader. No longer a nation of laws devoted to individual liberty, the U.S., thanks to the continuous deception of the media bootlickers, has become a nation of true believers and infidels. Few Banana Republics have a "free press" so complicit. See you on November 6th. –Dale

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

The Toilet Zone

Submitted for your approval. –Dale

Thursday, October 18, 2012

Benghaz-who?

Pantsuit Diplomacy, the hallmark of the Obama Doctrine. Party animal, Hillary Clinton will surely go down in history, not as a great stateswoman, but as the last refuge for hopelessly skeevy Democrats. The responsibility follies going on in Barryworld are nothing new. Nixon impersonator, David Frye put it best, "I accept the responsibility but not the blame. Let me explain the difference. Those who are to blame lose their jobs. Those who are responsible do not." –Dale

Thursday, October 11, 2012

Gaming the System

Barry Obama, the toys and games President, shocked that Congress won't play along with overturning the American system of government, is changing the rules as he goes. This is a well documented tactic of spoiled brats everywhere. The solution? A sound beating in November. –Dale

Thanks to All Right Magazine Editor, Fairfield Pinpoint Edwards for the Operation concept.

Thursday, October 4, 2012

Valley Forgery

My apologies to the memory of Arnold Friberg, the fine artist who's masterful "The Prayer at Valley Forge" is reproduced above my parody, "The Player at Valley Forge G&CC." George Washington chose to suffer for our country's sake along with the Continental Army at Valley Forge during the darkest days of our new nation. By contrast, our current "leader," causes the nation to suffer for his sake while he and his leftist minions engineer our darkest days since Valley Forge. –Dale

Thursday, September 27, 2012

Electile Dysfunction

From sham marriage to American foreign policy in shambles, Hillary has come a long way, baby. While Barry subjects himself to intense grilling from giant intellects like David Letterman and Whoopi Goldberg, Hillary, with the help of Saudi princess, Huma Weiner, has been left in charge to implement the 'albatrossic' Obama doctrine of betraying friends and coddling enemies. Hillary is taking the meetings Obama has no time for, and has, in effect, become our proxy President. A bumpy road indeed. Unfortunately, those bumps are the graves of patriots. –Dale 

Thursday, September 20, 2012

Blowout

The infamous Cliff which Dear Leader has been driving us off of for the last three and a half years, is finally on fire. No amount of masochistic national groveling Barry displays to the "Muslim world" can atone for our infidel status. Yet Barry and his media droolers will not open their eyes to the fact that murderers, rapists, thieves and liars are the heart and soul of Islam. But, if a winking alliance with Islam is what it takes for the left to transform America into a really hip Marxist paradise... oh well. The Cliff is reportedly 41 miles high, so if you're worried that Barry might be injured by the fall, fear not, his pink chiffon Volt will be out of juice before he hits bottom. –Dale

Thursday, September 13, 2012

Hack Like Me

The enigmatic Obama, jumping from fundraiser to fundraiser, staying cool while the nation and the world spin out of control. The only thing that animates him is blaming his shortcomings on his political opponents. At his appearances, he plasters on that phony grin, tells a few whoppers and chokes out "God bless the U.S.A.," just like every hack politician since the beginning of time. But if he gets back into office, we'll see the real hacking begin as he takes out America's other leg. –Dale